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Unabashed Spoiler Hound & Fanfic writer

Reveling in the fickle nature of fangirlishness

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Jump the Shark: "I think it's too late for us. This is our life. This is who we are, okay?"
sophie_deangirl
 "Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family."  -- Anthony Brandt

"You don't choose your family.  They are God's gift to you, as you are to them." - Desmond Tutu

"Family quarrels are bitter things.  They don't go according to any rules. They're not like aches or wounds, they're more like splits in the skin that won't heal because there's not enough material." --F. Scott




Okay, if there was a way to fall in LOVE with Dean any more than I already have (SO mainly having to do with Jensen and how he continues to portray him), I have found it.  This episode just was WONDERFUL!!!!!  It took what is usually considered a death knell for a show (and I loved that they didn't run away from the fact at the end. Adam was still their brother and Dean gave him the respect he earned for being that. They didn't take the easy route by having the ghouls fabricating the whole thing to lure them there)  and completely turned it around into the perfect reflection of the brothers' relationship as it stands now as well as how differently they are evolving from their respective experiences thus far.  I was completely enthralled, blown away and just...WOW!!!! And once again, the ending, Dean's words to Sam, OH!! It capped off the episode perfectly and heartbreakingly.

You totally see the continuing strain on their brotherly relationship, but more dramatically you see a turnaround of viewpoint. Though I have always believed that Dean deep down wanted Sam to have the same chance at a normal life as Adam, that for a time, it wasn't too late for Sam too, for Dean, yes, but not for Sam, the window closed on both of them when all the discoveries were made about Sam being fed demon blood and their mom making a deal. Of the few moments when they seemed so much like brothers like the "rock, paper, scissors" moment (Jensen can just do comedy so freakin' well!! His reaction is so delightfully boyish.  I just giggled), it made my heart break. Those moments seem so superficial now, so rote that they have lost their meaning yet, I love seeing them and miss that connection, tenuous as it is now.

Okay, this was a DeanGirl's dream of an episode. So guess what that means? I will likely babble on and on about how great Dean was, so consider yourself sufficiently warned to run while you still can.

Dean shined brighter as much as Sam darkened even more in this episode, the distinction becoming harder to ignore.  Jensen and Jared just did INCREDIBLE work here to distinguish Dean and Sam and how far apart from each other they are. You can feel the divide widening, you can feel for how Dean and Sam don't believe the same things anymore.  And I have to say, as a fanfiction writer, I claim vindication in the end when Dean finally admits that Sam is more like their father than he could ever be and for me, that's a good thing.  

"You know, I finally get why you and Dad butted heads so much.  You two are practically the same person.  I mean, I worshipped the guy, you know? I dress like him, I acted like him, I listened to the same music, but you were more like him than I will ever be.  I see that now."

Sam took it as a compliment, but I didn't and I wasn't sure Dean meant it completely that way either with his non-committal comment back. More on the scene later, but I LOVED this because I have always maintained in my stories, as do other writers, that Dean was never like John, that Sam was more like John.  

Dean may have embraced the hunting life, understood, especially in this episode, that it's too late to change for both of them, but in the end, the way Dean approaches hunting and the people they help is completely different, especially with kids. His protective nature towards Sam, his respect for wanting to preserve the innocence of childhood and children or innocence in general (Sam (he's a given, of course), Lucas, Michael, Ben, Cole and now Adam), his ability to reassess and adapt his assumptions when confronted with proof of something else (like going from Adam is a demon to Adam is their brother) and much more are Dean's strengths.  Those qualities were clearly evident in this one episode alone.  I loved that despite their differences, Dean comes to the rescue at the end, cares for Sam as he takes care of his wounds. Not that Dean would do otherwise, it's in his nature to provide help and aid, especially to Sam, but  if you really look at that scene, it's the epitome of loving care, my heart just sighed with comfort watching Dean trying to staunch the bleeding in Sam's arms, seeing the empathy on Dean's face for Sam's pain.  To me, they extended that scene for a reason.  They could have easily just gone to a commercial after Dean killed Adam, but no, they showed Dean tending to Sam, not only showing Dean's compassion towards a brother he still loves but isn't sure he knows anymore. When Dean said, "that's what family's for, right?" you saw that the one thing he does believe in from Sam's speechifying to Adam earlier is that family is everything.  Even the way he treats Adam's body at the end shows Dean's respect for family.

There were just SO many WONDERFUL moments and lines (not that I won't try to mention as many as I can here --told you, fair warning - hee -- likely repeating some over and over more than others, hee!). I LOVED that Dean went off half-cocked, at first,  about not wanting to believe that Adam was their brother.  It ranged from hunter's instincts to deeply personal pain and disappointment. Jensen is just PHENOMENAL with these ranges. I didn't think Sam's relatively easy acceptance of a potential sibling was all that logical, I mean yes, his explanations, totally, I can see it, John probably wasn't a monk, he had needs when he was alone, heck, Dean might even accept it if it was just about that alone, after all, you know Dean seeks solace that way, but I think Dean's reaction was more honest, that the hurt he felt at being denied a normal life, a normal father-son relationship like Adam got to have really hurt him and that, at least initially, it was easier to believe that Adam was some kind of monster than actually a long lost brother who got everything he and Sam never did. I think it's a natural reaction.

Sam's reaction at least at the start...I don't know. It just rang wrong for me, but maybe that was the point. I mean, Sam wasn't being obnoxious at that point (don't hate me, SamGirls out there, but later, you have to admit Sam was scary cold about the work and treated Dean pretty dismissively), he was just trying to make Dean see that it might be possible that Adam was their brother, but since Sam was the one who wanted a normal life until recently, you'd think he'd be just as hurt as Dean to learn that there was this other son that John hid from them (another reason for Sam to be angry -- he hated that their dad kept secrets -- all the need-to-know stuff) and how Adam had gotten all of the fatherly attention that they didn't.  At least later, Dean came to the conclusion that their dad's motives were to protect Adam.  Some might view it as Dean justifying, yet again, his father's need-to-know behavior towards them, acting like the good soldier, but I didn't see it that way.  I just saw it as Dean understanding what their dad had intended for Adam. I think it was noble of Dean to realize that John saw Adam as someone he could spare from the hunting life, to give a normal life to, maybe to live the normal life with that he couldn't with Sam and Dean.  Who could blame Dean for mourning the loss from his point of view? But once he understood, he didn't hold it against Adam and like Dean always does, he took on the responsibility to make sure that Adam would be protected and that he would give him back the normal life their father had given him.  I can't tell you how much I melted when Dean said that he would give Adam that chance for a normal life. I was just a puddle!!!

I loved that as Adam talked about John and his participation in his life, you see the pain, loss, disappointment and anger on Dean's face and you can almost hear him saying, "why did Adam get to go to a baseball game with Dad and not me?"  It's a legitimate feeling of jealousy that later Sam expresses more from tone of voice as opposed to outwardly saying it.  I know that they both viewed Adam as the son they could've been to John and who could blame them, however, they took different paths towards embracing their new sibling. Sam wants to groom him as another Winchester son going into "the life" and Dean views the fact that since John never told them about Adam it was John's way of protecting him, of giving Adam the chance that he couldn't give to them.  I LOVED this interpretation of Dean's.  It's so caring, so unselfish:  

"Why do you think Dad never told us about this kid, Sam, huh? Why do you think he ripped out the pages? Because he was protecting  him."

"Dad's dead, Dean."  

"It doesn't matter!  He didn't want Adam to have our lives, okay? And we're gonna respect his wishes."



Admission here: I was SO in love with how this episode played out, how Dean wanted to give Adam a chance at a normal life, how he wanted to kill whatever was after him so that he could give that to him. It just tugged  at my heart so much, even now, as I write this, I can't help, but feel complete and utter empathy and pride for how Dean has evolved and I feel such a strong affinity for everything he's lost and the maturity, (not achieved easily, but there just the same) he's showing for the acceptance of his life. It is completely believable and a wonderful sight to see after so many years of self-loathing and self-recrimination to the point of losing his own self-worth.  It's not a pity party anymore, it's recognition that this is who he is, as Zacariah told him. It's what he does and he does it well and there's a confidence there that isn't born from arrogance, just from innate abilities that come from years of training.  My heart was busting with pride for his evolution.

Dean has definitely become a better man, not perfect (although those who know me, know I think he's perfect -- hee), just better for all that he has gone through and overcome, the bad and the horrific, and then transforming them to his advantage, incorporating them into his being, again, admitting here that it was not easily accomplished or not without agony or intervention, but he's managing to do it and I think that's the important differentiation between him and Sam. Sam has  accepted hunting too, but, in my view, he's approaching it from a completely darker view.  

Sam is no less capable than Dean though I will hasten to add that I don't think Sam operates with the same intuition and due caution that Dean does (Sam has already shown that he hates Dean's cautious approach to hunting demons in episode one) and often that gets him into trouble more often, as evidenced when he gets captured by the ghouls, but the key difference and what prevents Sam from seeing things objectively is that his motivation to hunt is driven by revenge just as it was for John and the fact that he was trying to capitalize on Adam losing his mother as a way to pass on that painful legacy to Adam speaks to Sam's darker purpose, darker rationale for hunting.  He considers Adam to be a piece of meat, targeted by evil just as he and Dean are and that his only choice in life is to go into hunting and be prepared to fight evil.  Sam even considers it his duty to train Adam how to shoot to defend himself.  Adam and his mom really did die at the hands of the ghouls, monsters that enacted their own revenge for John killing one of their own.  Could Adam have lived if, he too, had been dragged into hunting like Dean and Sam or was it worth it to leave Adam in the dark in the hopes that he would be untouched? Was Sam right? Hard to know.  So many "what ifs", but if you were to ask Dean, I'm sure that though Dean feels the loss of his newly found brother, he would defend John's desire to give Adam that normal life. You can't help but feel that Dean would have felt that any moment of normal life would have been worth it.

Revenge clouds everything as we've seen with the Winchester legacy. Dean's statement about how Sam is more like John really is true just more glaringly so now. Dean has never shown that need for vengeance.  Even when they faced Jake who killed Sam, Dean didn't even act vengeful towards him, in fact, it was Sam who shot Jake to death, the cold stare in his eyes was there even back then as if he enjoyed killing Jake, Jake's blood splattering and dotting Sam's face.  I will NEVER forget the look of shock on Bobby's face in that scene.  You can't help, but wonder if Bobby suspected something was just a little off about Sam even for a split second.  Dean's closest act of acknowledging payback was when he killed Azazel then said that was for their mom.   Even there, I saw closure rather than vengeance and Dean was ending it not only for themselves, but maybe especially for their dad because it was his vengeance. Dean was just finishing what John wasn't able to.  Sidenote: In Shadow, John reveals his disappointment that he wouldn't be the one to end things with Azazel, that he's leaving it up to his sons to finish it.  I can well see Sam desiring the same vengeance with Lillith.  WIll he be able to finish it? Time will tell. 

The beauty of this episode for me was Dean's very clear-headed approach to the case as well as to finding out he had a brother.  Was he hurt? Sure. Was he angry that he had lost out on Adam's childhood?Absolutely. But once he understood the connection that John and Adam had and got over his initial reaction, both from the hunter and son perspectives, he then just saw a young man who was worried about his mother and in my rose-colored glasses view made a decision that he would protect Adam and destroy the monster threatening to rob him of a normal life like Azazel did to him and Sam.  That transition was amazing and heart warming. The transition was completely believable.

DeanGirl moments: When Dean said the cops don't have his eyes, I went to a silly place and thought, "No one does."  Sigh...And when Lisa at the bar said "Now you're here,"  well, I just about swooned.  Okay, who am I kidding?  I did swoon.

Okay, some might argue that Sam was playing more brother to Adam than Dean, talking to him about the life, teaching him about guns, showing him how to shoot, maybe even to the point of protecting him when the ghoul tried to grab Adam in his car, but Sam also wanted to use Adam as bait and that, I felt was totally wrong.  The look on Dean's face while he watched Sam train Adam to shoot a gun was one I saw as painful, recalling the times he had been trained by their dad and it wasn't necessarily good memories for Dean and to see Sam pass on that training to Adam, you got the impression that Dean didn't approve. The memories are what they are since they can't be changed, but I can see Dean's reaction as one of disgust too, to watch Sam indoctrinate Adam.  One could even see Sam training Adam as a mirror of John training either Dean or Sam, but I would never equate it as fatherly in any way.

I saw Dean as being more protective and fatherly than Sam was being and wanted to give back the normal life Adam was being deprived of. Okay, maybe not realistic, but totally noble in my view. I'll give on this point because I admit to being prejudiced about it.  Hee! This point can be be argued favorably and not so favorably depending on the point of view, even to go as far as to say that Dean kept his distance so he wouldn't become attached to Adam, but I don't see it that way because Dean's protective instincts often overrides the emotional and in this case even more so because he has a personal interest. He had to keep focus to see it through. He couldn't let attachment or emotion cloud his judgment.

I loved the conversation about Dean calling Sam out to find out why he's trying to teach the very things that he hated about hunting and the life to Adam, that quoting dad chapter and verse was completely out of character for Sam.  The look on Dean's face is both utter shock and complete mystification.  Could this be his brother talking? Suddenly Dad was right?  All along even? Who is this guy?  The reaction makes complete sense.  


"Listen to yourself, man."

"You think I'm wrong?"

"I think it's too late for us. This is our life. This is who we are, okay? And it's fine, I accept that. But with Adam, he's  still got a chance, man.  He can go to school. He can be a doctor -"

"What makes Adam so special?"

"What?  Are you jealous of the kid?'

"Are you?"



Yikes, pretty harsh words and when Sam says, "Are you?" you can hear the bitterness in his voice, the anger too.  You know that Sam is jealous. Maybe even so much so that he would drag Adam into the life just to prevent him from having the normal life he never got. Oh, and as another sidenote, when Adam asked about how John died and Sam told him that Dean killed the demon that killed their dad, I felt this resentment rise in Sam like he was saying "I'm tired of Dean always being the hero" or that Dean got to kill Azazel and not Sam because remember, Sam had just as much invested in revenge against Azazel as John for killing Jessica as well as for feeding him his demon blood.  I think his drive to kill Lillith could be a culmination of every revenge he wasn't able to exact himself.  I think a part of Sam wants to be the hero of the Apocalypse and something inside of him believes that killing Lillith will accomplish everything he's never been able to control.  

Then:


"Dad didn't have a choice with us, okay, but with Adam he did. Adam doesn't have to be cursed."

"He's a Winchester. He's already cursed."



Dean doesn't believe that being a Winchester is an automatic curse and you can see that he wants to give Adam a chance, that hunting isn't a foregone conclusion for a Winchester.  I LOVED that.  The look on Dean's face is just so convincing and you inwardly cheer that Dean wants to do that, wants to give Adam a chance (sorry, I know I'm repeating myself -- told you, completely gobsmacked by this episode).

I found the revenge and family thread really interesting as well and perfectly drawn. The ghouls wanted their revenge for John killing one of their own.  John wanted revenge for Mary's death. Sam wants payback from Lillith for what she did to Dean. Family and revenge. It seems to play through this season a lot, but it's one that has followed our WInchester boys too.

"Like you said, Sam.  The only thing you can count on is family."

Then,

"Revenge. It's never over, is it, Sam?"

I love this connection and it's true.  


The fact that Sam tells Adam:

"And I know what it's like to want revenge."

says alot about Sam yet again, where he is truly coming from.  It's all about revenge.


Revenge is a dish best served cold.


Side note:  The comment about Sam's blood tasting different? Ewww, but telling.  I maintain that drinking Ruby's blood to get his power boost will prove to change Sam more than just strange tasting blood.  In fact, I'm beginning to think that his whole change in attitude, his sudden acceptance of John's creeds, are all a part of a transformation into something a lot more sinister.  Perhaps drinking Ruby's blood, combining with the blood he already has in him from Azazel might be turning Sam into a demon.  After all, it's not hard to believe that Sam's desire to exact this revenge on Lillith and his general belief that being armed and ready for battle is more of a demon construct than a human one, especially if it, again, is a means to an end like when Sam lied to Cole in Death Takes a Holiday about letting him stay with his mother to get him to tell where he saw the black mist.  Back in Road Kill, Sam did  his best to protect Molly from learning that she was a ghost reliving her death over and over again.  In this episode, he's even willing to use Adam as bait and without any reservations unlike Dean that agonized over using Michael as bait in Something Wicked because the Shtriga would only take children. Sam in this episode offers the idea of one of them being the bait rather than Michael, a far cry from his viewpoint now.  Evolution and devolution. You see it plain as day with Dean and Sam.

When Dean comes to save Sam...okay, gotta say it, every time Dean comes to the rescue, my heart just skips a beat in joy.  I get all "my hero" about it.  And when Sam thanks him, Dean just smiles as if saying "aw shucks, t'wern't nothing" then says, "That's what family's for, right?" I just about fainted dead away from the gentility, the loving way Dean takes care of Sam in this scene.  I just...sigh...there are no words...

Once again, like episodes past, it's the ending that hits the mark emotionally and sometimes shockingly.  The revelations made at the end really makes you anticipate what might happen next. This episode was no exception. 

I LOVED the solemn nature of its start with Dean showing due reverence to Adam, acknowledging beautifully that Adam was still their brother, still family, that the ghouls hadn't made that up.

"Adam was our brother. He died like a hunter.  He deserves to go out like one."

SO wonderful a tribute to family.  I didn't like Sam's suggestion that they ask Castiel to bring Adam back. Sam viewed it as calling in a favor, but I found that to suggest bargaining what Sam and Dean have done so far in the crusade to save the world to bring Adam back unseemly.  Adam wasn't going to Hell and again, Dean knows that what's dead should stay dead (less in the angry way that he thought of that when he applied his own resurrection to it which was based on a deal his father made), understanding that resurrection is not the answer no matter how much you want that person back, that there are consequences.  It makes you wonder if Dean wonders just a little in the back recesses of his mind whether bringing Sam back was a mistake, that the Sam who was his brother may have been left behind in the resurrection and a little of something else brought back. Maybe Azazel's taunt wasn't just a tease to hurt Dean or give him doubt.  Maybe it was a demon who was telling the truth where the truth would hurt the most.

"No, Adam is in a better place."

Now, after Tessa's remarks in Death Takes a Holiday about what people say to comfort themselves about where a dead loved one ends up, you'd think Dean wouldn't use the phrase, but I think he does with sincerity and truly hopes and  believes it's better for Adam to be laid to rest than to be resurrected, having experienced both.  

Oh, sidenote:  The undertaker scene! And Dean saying that he thinks about where he would like to spend eternity all of the time was both poignant and hilarious too!


I want to end with commenting on an article from BuddyTV that rankled NO END.  Here's the link to it:

BuddyTV: Supernatural: Papa Winchester was a Rolling Stone

My friend, Laughter's Melody did a FANTASTIC analysis defending Dean from the "accusations" in this article so I don't want to repeat her wonderful words and points, please take a moment to read it, especially if you are a DeanGirl like me.  

I just need to rant on a few points:

Sam, however, lives by this same code.  All season long he's been drinking demon blood, slowly giving up a piece of his humanity, in order to become strong enough to defeat demons.  Hunting was something he never wanted to do, but now it's his life and Sam will do whatever it takes to do it.

Supernatural has always been about the sacrifices people make.  Dean was willing to give up his soul to bring his brother back to life, but that isn't the kind of sacrifice men like John and Sam believe in.  Sam is giving up his humanity not to save the life of someone he loves, but for good.  He's willing to go over to the dark side and drink up the demon power in order to do what must be done.

-- How does what Sam is doing, giving up his humanity by drinking Ruby's blood a good thing?  And I beg to differ that Sam is doing it to stop the Apocalypse alone.  Let's remember that his primary goal was to get Lillith and it still is.  He so much has told Dean that he was going to be the one to kill Lillith.  Seems to me that's his first and foremost goal.  Back to revenge again.  The Apocalypse is purely secondary on his TO DO list in my view DESPITE his comments to Prophet Chuck about feeling like Dean isn't Dean and isn't up to doing it himself.  As I said, losing your humanity isn't noble to me and rationalizing that it's the best sacrifice if it means saving the world is just incomprehensible to me. I don't believe that losing one's humanity to achieve powers to use to save the world is noble or heroic in any way.  That Dean is trying to maintain his humanity throughout all this makes him a better man and will give him a power that can't be quantified by how a person can pull a demon out of a host or ripping a demon to shreds (Alistair).  It's easy to give into evil, it's A LOT harder to keep yourself from becoming evil.


On Supernatural, even though Dean looks and acts like the tough guy, he's the whiny liberal while Sam is Jack Bauer.  Dean would give up his own life to save someone he loves.  But would he give up his life to save a total stranger?  Or would he kill someone in order to save others?  Sam would in the blink of en eye, which is why he's more like John Winchester than Dean could ever hope to be.

-- All I can say is "DOES THIS GUY EVEN WATCH OUR SHOW?" or "IS HE WATCHING THE SAME SHOW WE ARE?"  Enough said. Talk about wanting to rip someone a new one!!

 
I could go on and on, but I'd just be repeating myself more than I already have and just get all drooly.  It was a GREAT episode and I can't wait for The Rapture this week.  Forgive any mistakes I've made in this blog. I've got aTON of work to do and just wanted to get this posted before this week's show.  Those who know how addled I get talking about Dean, effusing about Dean, especially from an episode that just made me swoon over all the Dean goodness will understand my babble.

Thanks for reading as always.  It's always appreciated!





 

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I have always believed that Dean deep down wanted Sam to have the same chance as Adam, that for a time, it wasn't too late for Sam too, for him, yes, but not for Sam then the window closed on both of them.

So well put! I've always thought that was why Dean reacted the way he did when Sam left for Stanford. I think he figured that Sam had finally broken away, that he was getting the life he wanted, a normal life, and that was worth all the pain of letting him go. But after Jess, and everything that's happened since, it really is too late for him now too.

Of the few moments when they seemed so much like brothers like the "rock, paper, scissors" moment (Jensen can just do comedy so freakin' well!! His reaction is so delightfully boyish. I just giggled), it made my heart break. Those moments seem so superficial now, so rote that they have lost their meaning yet, I love seeing them and miss that connection, tenuous as it is now.

Totally! Those moments are very bittersweet now, hollow somehow, as much fun as they are to see. And I agree, Jensen is so good at that, lol! I can't help wondering if Dean always looses on purpose...

...the way Dean approaches hunting and the people they help is completely different, especially with kids. His protective nature towards Sam, his respect for wanting to preserve the innocence of childhood and children or innocence in general (Sam (he's a given, of course), Lucas, Michael, Ben, Cole and now Adam), his ability to reassess his assumptions and much more.

So very well said!!!

I think Dean's reaction was more honest, that the hurt he felt at being denied a normal life, a normal father-son relationship like Adam had really hurt him and that, at least initially, it was easier to believe that Adam was some kind of monster than actually a long lost brother who got everything he and Sam never did. I think it's a natural reaction.

I agree. I don't blame Dean for feeling that way at all. I honestly think anyone would. And, I think for Dean too there's a double blow in that I think Dean always pictured John as being unfailingly loyal to their mom, even after her death. This probably feels like a betrayal, even if it wasn't meant that way. And, on to of that, he knows now that John was willing to go out of his way to be a dad to Adam, when he never seemed to have time to do that for Sam and Dean.

"Why do you think Dad never told us about this kid, Sam, huh? Why do you think he ripped out the pages? Because he was protecting him."

"Dad's dead, Dean."

"It doesn't matter! He didn't want Adam to have our lives, okay? And we're gonna respect his wishes."


What is with Sam and not respecting the wishes of the dead?! *hmph* Yes, they're dead and gone...but that doesn't mean you shouldn't honor them! Honoring them in death is a way of showing how much they meant to you in life. With Sam lately, it almost feels like he takes the "out of sight, out of mind" approach when it comes to what people wanted, and that worries me...

Dean's closest act of acknowledging payback was when he killed Azazel then said that was for their mom. Even there, I saw closure rather than vengeance.

I agree completely! And there was Alistair too...if Dean should have wanted revenge against anyone, it was him. He tortured Dean for 30 years until he broke and started to become what he hated. But Dean didn't seem to want revenge, and torturing Alistair as he did was to help the angels...not to get revenge. I can't help but think that Sam wouldn't have taken a lot more pleasure in it now.

You know that Sam is jealous. Maybe even so much so that he would drag Adam into the life just to prevent him from having the normal life he never got.

Oh, chilling point!!!

Thank you again for all your incredibly kind comments on my journal entry about that article! I love what you said too!!! That Dean is trying to maintain his humanity throughout all this makes him a better man and it's easy to give into evil, it's A LOT harder to keep yourself from becoming evil. That sums everything up so perfectly!

INCRDIBLE blog as always! :)

-Laughter

Hey Soph! Late to your party again, but I couldn't agree more with you on this one! Good Lord, we got to see Jensen and all his glorious, glorious range! What a great ep! SO, SO, GOOD to see BADASSHunter Dean again!-YOWZA!! How HOT! HOT! HOT! was he in this one?! LOVED when he was arming up to go meet Adam while Sam gave him the low-down on the kid. LOVED that all his hunter instincts were screaming "TRAP"(which actually proved true by the end!). LOVED him on the razor's edge of violence in the diner-GUH!!! LOVED him in his FBI Trenchcoat of Hotness both in the bar and when he pulled up in the Impala(so much Impala in this one, too-YAY!) and saved Sam from the monster and then that altogether sexy move when he took a parting shot at it under the truck(the loosened tie does. me. in.-MERCY MAUD! His looks and moves made THAT scene SO DAMN SEXY!!! YOWZA X 2!!!) And let's not forget that wonderfully oh-so-limber move to escape the crypt through the angel window(nice, nice touch-eh?)...*sigh*...such FLEXIBILITY, don't you think?! Makes one conjure up all kinds of naughty thoughts...*wink*... And when he came at the end to save Sam from GhoulAdam and his "sister"?-MAN! I can't tell you what it does to me when he wields his sawed-off-it's like it's a natural extension of his being-again, HOW DOES HE DO THAT?! SWOOOOOOON!!!
But we also got huge emotional gut punches in this one, too, didn't we?! God, his reactions to Adam as John's "secret" son and life as evidenced through the pictures-my heart broke into a million pieces for him. Your descriptions of the changes he went through as he processed everything through-out the ep were spot-on and they were mine, too. I watched with my girlfriend yesterday and she commented on how nuch more visibly Dean was affected by this new "brother" than Sam was. I think because Dean was so much closer to John this betrayal of trust on his father's part was just another lie, another secret, that is making Dean question the reciprocity of his love for John and in turn, Sam, who is becoming John right before his eyes, this season. He is beginning to see how they have hurt him, taken advantage of him, and taken him for granted-and while it IS a good thing for his eyes to be opened so that he can see all clearly now-it is also incredibly, incredibly sad...as we saw in that last scene-and what a lovely, lovely and subtle piece of acting there by our guy-his face!!! THE HURT!!! I also loved his facial expressions when he found RealAdam horrifically muedered in the coffin-how it went from sorrow at the lost opportunity to have known this, his "real" younger brother to desperate fear when he realized that something terrible had Sam. I literally went from "HOLY S***" to puddling on the floor in that scene when Dean first so violently bashed in GhoulAdam's head(YIKES X 3!!!!) and then so gently came and ministered to Sam's injuries...*THUD*... Seriously, Jensen Ackles has come to own my soul with the range of emotion he evokes in me and this ep was a tour de force for him and me. Love him. Love him. Love him. Still not liking Sam this season and his treatment of his brother. Hoping for better this season, but I'm starting to think we may have to wait for S5 for that. I liked the kid who played Adam. I thought he did a great job. I liked how he conveyed respect for Dean as a man and a hunter with even the limited interactions he had with him-something we've had far too little of from Sam this year. So with you on the "They don't have my eyes..." line-as I think was every Deangirl out there! Thanks for a great post, Sweet! Looking forward to Dean "protecting his guardian angel" tonight! See you next week!

Oops, forgot to add my thoughts on John Kubicek-a bigger A**hole does not exist on the planet. He is an embarrassment to that site, IMO, and I wouldn't even deign to call him a writer. The fact that they keep him and allow him to use that title, reflects so poorly on their professionalism that I must assume they are not concerned with professionalism. It's a shame, isn't it?

Thank you for the comments everyone!

Thanks for the great comments! As always I appreciate them and am glad you enjoyed my babble. LaughtersMelody: I LOVED your point about Alistair: "I agree completely! And there was Alistair too...if Dean should have wanted revenge against anyone, it was him. He tortured Dean for 30 years until he broke and started to become what he hated. But Dean didn't seem to want revenge, and torturing Alistair as he did was to help the angels...not to get revenge. I can't help but think that Sam wouldn't have taken a lot more pleasure in it now." --Dean was pained at having to exact torture on Alistair. You can tell he hated every moment even when he tried to show that he was to fool Alistair. And you're so right about Dean! "And, I think for Dean too there's a double blow in that I think Dean always pictured John as being unfailingly loyal to their mom, even after her death. This probably feels like a betrayal, even if it wasn't meant that way. And, on to of that, he knows now that John was willing to go out of his way to be a dad to Adam, when he never seemed to have time to do that for Sam and Dean." --I loved this point. I think that Dean still loves and reveres his mother's memory so it makes sense that he would feel hurt for her, not so much as being unfaithful for Dean can forgive that, their mother was long gone, but more that John let the vengeance in the name of her death go for his other family, but not for him. Thanks for making those great points that I missed. Arafel: I can always count on you to voice all of the lovely lustful goodness that is Dean Winchester. I chuckled and giggled and enjoyed every word. And I TOTALLY forgot to mention the delicious DeanGirl moment of him escaping the crypt. I knew I could count on you to remember it. HEE!! Yes, I agree, this episode of DeanGirl-a-lious in every single way both in the hotness factor, but like you said, also in the emotions factor. HOW DOES JENSEN DO THAT? Indeed, how wonderful he is!!! "LOVED him in his FBI Trenchcoat of Hotness both in the bar and when he pulled up in the Impala(so much Impala in this one, too-YAY!) and saved Sam from the monster and then that altogether sexy move when he took a parting shot at it under the truck(the loosened tie does. me. in.-MERCY MAUD! His looks and moves made THAT scene SO DAMN SEXY!!! YOWZA X 2!!!)" -- Okay, I was DYING laughing at this. Like I've said, Dean in a suit. DROP.DEAD.GORGEOUS!!! There aren't enough adjectives in the WORLD!! Thanks for a really delightful read of your comments! You SLAY me, girl! Oh, and your parting shot at that BuddyTV writer (I REFUSE to acknowledge him in print). Give me a high 5, woman!

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