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Unabashed Spoiler Hound & Fanfic writer

Reveling in the fickle nature of fangirlishness

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Swan Song: "I'm not going to leave you. I'm not going to leave you."
sophie_deangirl
I have also seen children successfully surmounting the effects of an evil inheritance. That is due to purity being an inherent attribute of the soul.  -Mohandas Gandhi

Love is the most difficult and dangerous form of courage. Courage is the most desperate, admirable and noble kind of love. -Delmore Schwartz

It was when Lucifer first congratulated himself upon his angelic behavior that he became the tool of evil. -Dag Hammarskjld




This episode was a WONDERFUL season finale, full of all the things that make Supernatural the show that it is.  It pulls on the very elements that make it more than just a horror show, a show about demons and ghosts. In the final analysis, it's about family which Chuck said to cap the episode off. Jared and Jensen just killed in this episode. Their bond as friends outside of the show continues to make the difference in how they act their  characters.You believe that bond wholeheartedly, ache for its beauty as well as for its flaws, and of course, root for its survival. I cried more than once in this episode and it's in those moments the episode succeeded and soared!  There were reservations and a wish that maybe it should have been a 2 hour finale because, in my eyes, there seemed to be so many things that were left undone, unfinished, and quite honestly were left unsatisfying for me. I'll get to those later, but first to the GREAT stuff!

Oh my gosh!!! What I LOVED about the episode was how it handled Sam and Dean's relationship! I JUST ABOUT CRIED my eyes out when just 5-10 minutes into it, Dean and Sam have their "talk". Dean tells Sam that letting him become Lucifer's vessel goes against everything in him and who he is (this turns out to be a great parallel because at the end, Dean finds himself where he never wants to be, without Sam), but that he has to let Sam have the choice and more importantly, that he was with him.  I JUST ABOUT finished a kleenex box on that scene alone!  Normally, a scene like that comes AFTER the episode is over at very the end, but it was killer to have it start that way.

"Dean? What's going on?"

"I'm in."

"In with?"

"The whole up with Satan thing. I'm on board."

"You're going to let me say yes."

"No, that's the thing. It's not on me to let you do anything. You're a grown...overgrown man. If this is what you want, I'll back your play."

"That's the last thing I thought you'd ever say."

"Might be. I'm not gonna lie to you though. It goes against every fiber I got. But the truth is, watching out for you, it's kinda been my job, you know? But more than that, it's kind of who I am. You're not a kid anymore, Sam and I can't keep treating you like one. Maybe I gotta grow up a little too. I don't know if we've got a snowball's chance, but...but I do know that if anybody can do it, it's you."

"Thank you."

"If this is what you want...is this really what you want?"

"I let him out. I gotta put him back in."

"Okay. That's it then."


The moment was honest, it was poignant and inevitably Dean kept his word, he backed the play, reluctantly, and he didn't leave Sam alone to do it all alone or to die alone. He was with him.


"I just want you to understand, the only thing that you're going to see out there is Michael killing your brother."

"Well, then I ain't going to let him die alone."



He didn't leave him and he reached Sam so that he could defeat Lucifer's control by saying he would never leave him and by Sam finding that toy soldier, all the rushing memories that allowed him to remember who he was, Sam Winchester,  Dean's brother helped him overcome that control. That whole moment felt like a full circle moment, not only because the battle was going to happen in Lawrence, but because all I could think about was Devil's Trap and how Dean was being tortured by his own possessed father, begging him not to kill him and then John breaking through later. Sam broke free faster and held it. When Sam/Lucifer was beating Dean to a pulp (shades of Rocky Balboa -- ouch! Great make up -- how could anyone mar that handsome face, I'll never know - DeanGIrl moment) all I could think of was how Dean was pivotal for both moments, that his belief in his family has  always been so strong. I also thought, geez, the poor guy can't catch a break at the hands of his family.  Still, hearing Dean telling Sam he was there for him was just BEAUTIFUL:

"Sam, it's okay. It's okay. I'm here. I'm here. I'm never going to leave you. I'm never going to leave you."

Then when Sam regains control, he gives almost the same reassurance back to Dean:

"It's okay, Dean. It's gonna be okay. I've got him."

It's a moment that tugs and breaks your heart. For me, it shattered it. Yes, it was a moment worthy of the kind of reconciliation we've all been waiting for, that they both deserved, but as always with scenes like this, it happens too late. Not too late to say the words or to give the knowing looks, but too late to make that reconciliation a lasting one.  I think that in that way, Dean's survivor's guilt is that much more pronounced this time around.

YAY! Carry on Wayward Son was played again for the finale. It's about as expected at a finale as Bobby is, hee!  I SO LOVED how they incorporated the Impala into their story, their family history and of course, having Sam see the soldier in the cigarette butt holder helping him jog all those memories. It was SO GREAT.  I loved the speculation that Chuck might have been more than he was (Maybe God himself, writing their story) or maybe since the Winchesters finished their "gospels", he, as a prophet, wasn't needed anymore. I LOVED that he was the narrator! OH! And you probably heard my SCREAM when Bobby died (even though I was braced for it, though you're never fully braced for that especially because it happened so quickly, it felt undeserving of Bobby's worth to the boys to be killed so quick, still Dean's scream of "Nooooo" was no less glass breaking painful) and my CHEER when Cas brought him back!!!! How silly of me to think that just because they were planning to kill a "beloved character" like Bobby, didn't mean he wouldn't be brought back!!  What a total tease!!! How gullible was I?  You never saw such a happy person! Though I didn't care for the ominous mention that Dean and Bobby don't see each other for a long time after averting the Apocalypse. I hope that doesn't mean Bobby won't be back in Season 6. That would be a bummer, but if Season 6 explores Sam and Dean exclusively from a unique and different vantage point, I guess it has to be. Not happy about it though if they do omit Bobby. Jim Beaver has been a godsend this season. His more frequent appearances lent the much needed family cohesion the season needed and NO ONE can say,


“Get the hell off my property before I blast you so full of rock salt you crap margaritas.”

with quite the flair that Bobby does.


Sidenote: Though I understand why Crowley didn't show up in this episode, I found myself missing him. Still, since Lucifer was caged, it doesn't mean he can't show up again someday. He was an AWESOME character and gave the last couple of episodes the much needed humor to get us through. One dangling bit of unfinished business with him was whether he spared Bobby's soul or not.  I guess in the end, if Bobby had died and gone to Hell, however briefly, Cas brought him back to life. I have to think that if Cas can pull Dean from Hell, he could do that for Bobby as he calls himself, "new and improved" now. Lovely bit of reward that. It's one of many loose ends that bothered me a bit in the episode, not that I'm not happy Bobby isn't going to Hell.

I have to give BIG KUDOS to Jared Padalecki and that STUPENDOUS broken mirror examination of Sam. Talk about your ultimate split personality moment, but it was played to beautiful effect with that mirror. Jared playing Lucifer with all of his slimy intent and as Sam, fighting not to give Lucifer what he wants, his rage and anger, the quick to call up emotions that makes Sam so the perfect candidate to being Lucifer's vessel and yet unable to contain them being Lucifer's prisoner. You not only heard the dialogue, you saw it in plain and painful view. This was by far and away Jared's episode and he owned it with every acting chop he has. He was just as heroic as he could possibly be and played his sacrifice with the humility it needed.  This DeanGirl enjoyed every moment from when Sam tells Dean that he can't go after him once he's locked in the cage to when he gives Dean a nod just before he plunges into the hole. It was all so authentic and filled with SO MUCH love for his brother. Jared has played evil great as being possessed by Meg and by Lucifer, but at those moments with Dean when it's just them in this episode, Jared brought it home and there went the rest of the kleenex in my box. 

The only unsatisfying moment for me was what happened to Dean at the end. In an opposite turn, the ending disappointed a little and it played like a setback for Dean.  I couldn't accept that all Dean had gone through and suffered boiled down to so little for him in my eyes. This wasn't Jensen's fault, he played Dean's solemnity with perfect pitch as he always does, but Dean seemed more doomed than Sam and not just because ultimately it was Sam who sacrificed everything. For some reason, I felt Dean got left in the cold.

It was all happily ever after for Bobby and Cas and the world, but there's Dean, without Sam. What was his reward? Cas was kind of cruel throwing at Dean that he got what he wanted. No paradise, no Hell, just more of the same. I thought that it was SO HARSH!

"You got what you asked for, Dean. No Paradise, no Hell, just more of the same. I mean it, Dean, what would you rather have? Peace or freedom?"

Dean couldn't answer or maybe, more accurately, didn't want to answer because he didn't want to choose, maybe selfishly even wanting both.

It's like Dean got punished somehow for not wanting to sacrifice humanity and that by sacrificing his brother, he got what he deserved. It was painful. I mean, I felt like Dean got the short end of the stick because he refused to be Michael's vessel, for wanting to spare humanity the pissing match that would have killed thousands, if not more. It felt like he got squat for his choices.  Don't get me wrong, Sam's sacrifice was BEAUTIFUL, heroic, redeeming, and I'll be honest, to me, it was at an unfair cost to both of them, but I get the hard lesson that the writers were probably pushing and that was that free will has consequences, that choices have to be carefully made because once an act is done, it can't be taken back and if it's an act of "treason" to humanity as Sam committed, perhaps his only choice for redemption had to be the worst possible choice for Dean. Still, I felt like Dean got robbed, just like Dean did. I understood Dean's anger and I know that when he's talking about his reward, it seems like he's acting selfish like he was when he bargained his soul to get Sam back, I'll give that there's even some truth to Cas's words to him, but it still felt like a slap in the face. Maybe in Season 6, Dean will get something for all he's sacrificed, but I felt for Dean completely and I didn't think he was being selfish, just acting out in pain. I get that Dean feels like the both of them should have been taken out like Chuck said:

"Dean didn't want Cas to save him. Every part of him, every fiber he's got wants to die or find a way to get Sam back, but he isn't going to do either because he made a promise."

Maybe to some, the brothers wanting that normal life for each other, but never for themselves is a sign of weakness or serious psychological problems, but I can't help, but feel that it stems from love for each other and in the horrific world they live in, maybe it's too much to believe in a fairy tale for themselves. I also think that in a way, their happiness begins and ends with each other. If either of them wants a normal life, it has to be with other alive and well to watch it happen. I don't think that's all that bad of a thing. GIven the choice, I would rather have my loved ones around me to share in my happiness as opposed to living it all alone.

I hated that they glossed over any of Dean's hints of power in earlier episodes unless they are saving them for Season 6. I've lost faith that they will address them. I can't believe they were just one-shot moments, given only to solve a plot problem then taken away as if they never existed such as Dean killing the false prophet when supposedly only a "servant of Heaven" could. Was becoming a servant of Heaven from his decision to be Michael's vessel and some greater power gave him that honor so that he could kill the false prophet so he could fulfill his destiny? Or when he killed Zachariah?  Supposedly only angels can kill angels and he wasn't blinded by his visage as well. Was he an angel for that split second, endowed with angel abilities so he could kill Zach? Then it was all taken away? It just doesn't ring right and in a way, it doesn't feel right.

Now, I can see where you can make another argument that we also got what we wanted, Dean, human, without any powers, using only who he was to rescue Sam so that he could overcome Lucifer. If you ascribe to that, which I did and still do, we got that. Dean saved the world by saving Sam in the end, by telling him, brother to brother that he would never leave him. Still, you can't help but feel that in the end, Dean did get shortchanged.  Bobby and Cas got life, but all Dean got was a dead brother, two dead brothers if we're being technical. Now, I know that people will go on and on about how Dean hasn't really matured at all, that even after all that he's gone through, he's still wishing he had died or could bring Sam back as opposed to just accepting what's happened, fulfill his promise to Sam, committed as opposed to just going through the motions, that the only thing that's keeping him from repeating what happened in All Hell Breaks Loose is that promise. But I think that Dean explained that at the start. Being Sam's big brother is who Dean is. For better or worse, that is who he is, who he's been conditioned and trained to be in the best of loving ways. You can label him as dangerously co-dependent and everything else people have talked about in the past, but I think Dean just can't disconnect the love he has for his brother that simply and that easily. To me, that makes him noble to a fault.

"But the truth is, watching out for you, it's kinda been my job, you know? But more than that, it's kind of who I am."

Yes, I admit, shadows of All Hell Breaks Loose are written all over the place. He said something similar to a dead Sam. At least this time, he said it a living Sam. Maybe Dean hasn't grown up, but his love for his brother, it's real and constant. Sometimes, that's all anyone has.

Though Dean went back to Lisa, it felt TOTALLY WRONG for him to be there. I felt like he was just going through the motions. You can tell he's just not into his "new life", that he is only there because he promised Sam he would pursue a normal life. He didn't promise him that he'd be good at it. I know that Dean would never hurt Lisa or Ben and I know that he'll try really hard to keep that promise, maybe even start to succeed at it a little, but in the end, Sam's fate will always haunt Dean and I think it would haunt anyone. I mean it was no different than Sam being haunted at knowing that Dean was suffering in Hell. You can't begrudge Dean for feeling the same way about Sam being trapped with Lucifer. He so much as said so to Sam, that Sam's time in Hell would be WAY worse. I honestly believe that if either Dean or Sam had died with clean slates, without any conditions to ending up in Hell or with Lucifer, they could better accept each other's death. Not easily, not without mourning, probably for a really long time, but at least they would know the other was safe, at peace not suffering somehow.  I think knowing that Sam must be suffering can only eat away at Dean. It's not closure as anyone would want it. Jensen does such a WONDERFUL job of playing Dean so dissatisfied, so unhappy to be without Sam. It just breaks you watching it.

Sam's appearance under the street light struck my friend Tiffany as Sam looking evil. I didn't see Sam as looking evil even with the streetlight going off which never bodes well in the Winchester world. Oddly, I thought of the movie Star Man with Jeff Bridges.  In that, he plays an alien who takes the DNA of a dead man to inhabit Earth and he's a blank slate, with no memories of the dead man and his wife having to teach him earthly ways. I saw Sam as that blank slate when I saw his appearance.  Maybe the speculation that Season 6 will be about Sam's and Dean's "histories" will shed more light (ha, ha) on who they are and maybe if Sam is a clean slate when he returns, it will give Dean an opportunity to teach Sam normal things, to give Sam the normal life he wants for him. I  can totally see that happening, that Dean's new purpose will be to get a second chance at giving Sam a second chance.  Now THAT would be great!!! I'll be looking forward to that if that happens.

All in all, I really loved the episode. I have to admit that at the end of it, I felt dazed a bit. It's been a long road to the finale, both looking forward to it and dreading it. I guess when it was finally here and certain expectations weren't meant, I was a little disappointed at first despite my copious use of kleenex, but now, in the afterglow, it was more a great episode rather than a disappointing one, told by a storyteller/prophet, Chuck, connecting the creation of the Impala as part of the thread that ties Dean and Sam together. I loved the hints to their childhood and wondered if maybe by telling the end that way, wrapping up Season 5's arc that way, they were also setting us up for what to expect in Season 6. Whatever it is, I'm looking forward to it and happy that there is a Season 6.

There was an interview with Jensen who talked about talking with Josh Jackson about finishing his 5th season.  Jensen commented about how everyone was looking forward to leaving Dawson's Creek and doing something else when it ended and when asked by Josh Jackson if he wanted to stop doing Supernatural or if he was tired of doing it, Jensen said that he wasn't. That warmed my heart. It speaks to the INCREDIBLE ensemble of cast, crew, writers, directors et. al. that make that show great and it continues to show in the quality of each episode.  You may not like every episode or that every episode was a hit out of the park, but that didn't matter. All that mattered was no matter what the situation, you were with those Winchesters brothers to the bitter end. They made you believe in them, cheer for them, cry for them, "die" with them. Not many shows I have watched in my lifetime has struck that cord in me. Yes, it's a TV show, but it's one that touches us in ways we can totally relate and keeps us coming back for more. What more can a show ask for from its viewers and rabid fans? Hee!

Thanks for reading this season.  I have appreciated every comment. See you in Season 6, if not sooner.



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There were reservations and a wish that maybe it should have been a 2 hour finale because, in my eyes, there seemed to be so many things that were left undone, unfinished, and quite honestly were left unsatisfying for me. I'll get to those later, but first to the GREAT stuff!

Me too! I kept thinking it should have been a two hour season finale. That would have been awesome.

...beating Dean to a pulp (shades of Rocky Balboa -- ouch! Great make up -- how could anyone mar that handsome face, I'll never know - DeanGIrl moment)

Lol, again, I was thinking the same thing! OUCH.

This wasn't Jensen's fault, he played Dean's solemnity with perfect pitch as he always does, but Dean seemed more doomed than Sam and not just because ultimately it was Sam who sacrificed everything. For some reason, I felt Dean got left in the cold.

I thought so too in a lot of ways. I think maybe his "test" isn't quite over yet...

Supposedly only angels can kill angels and he wasn't blinded by his visage as well. Was he an angel for that split second, endowed with angel abilities so he could kill Zach? Then it was all taken away? It just doesn't ring right and in a way, it doesn't feel right.

So well said! That bugged me too. *pouts*

Now, I know that people will go on and on about how Dean hasn't really matured at all, that even after all that he's gone through, he's still wishing he had died or could bring Sam back as opposed to just accepting what's happened, fulfill his promise to Sam, committed as opposed to just going through the motions, that the only thing that's keeping him from repeating what happened in All Hell Breaks Loose is that promise.

I don't think it's a sign that he hasn't matured at all...I think it shows just *how much* he's grown. I honestly don't think he could have let Sam go before. I really don't think he could have lived with it. The way he reacted in AHBL...it stuck me as so different from how he reacted in Swan Song. There was a desperation in AHBL that was absent this time. The pain was there in spades, but not the desperation. Before, promise or no promise, I honestly think Dean would have swallowed his gun. This time, he can go on. Not easily, but I get the impression he can and will try.

You may not like every episode or that every episode was a hit out of the park, but that didn't matter. All that mattered was no matter what the situation, you were with those Winchesters brothers to the bitter end. They made you believe in them, cheer for them, cry for them, "die" with them.

So true! *grins* Fabulous, fabulous blog as always! I've so enjoyed your blogs this season. :)

-Laughter

I barely stopped crying from watching the finale, then read your review and I'm crying all over again...

You captured it pretty much exactly as I feel-the connection that exists between Dan and Sam, the heroic-ness of both of them.

The moment that devastated me the worst was right after Samifer and Michadam fall into the hole and it seals up, and brutalized Dean is leaning against the Impala without Sam OR Cas OR Bobby ... that to me was the most excruciating thing to see, when Dean was left with nothing. (And Jensen's face--gah, kill me, please!) Then Cas was back, and Bobby ...

At least Dean isn't completely alone. But I agree totally that knowing Sam is in hell is what will torment Dean. He could accept if Sam was dead but KNOWING what Sam is going to suffer FOREVER--that is never going to let Dean have a happy, normal life.

Oh, show...

Your idea of Sam being a 'blank slate' under the streetlight--never thought of that! Would be an amazing twist, but I kinda hope it isn't that way, I think that would be really hard for Dean, that his brohter would be there but not remember him.

It was weird that show didn't follow through with the hints about Dean being able to kill the Whore of Babylon and Zachariah. Maybe they were left for next season? Or maybe it made sense in Kripke's mind and we just aren't seeing it. And I'm sure Bobby's soul deal will come up next year, as will Crowley himself.

Thanks for your insightful analysis (even if it did make me cry again!)

Now we have to wait...

I didn't think Dean was the only one who got short changed because I mean at least he's not spending eternity stuck in a pit like Sam was at the end of this episode but I did feel that Sam and Dean are both very tortured characters and it felt fitting that while they saved the world they were both still in hell one physically and one mentally. Oh boys.

I found this to be the most emotionally satisfying hour of this show ever. It really left me shaken and sobbing and that is a RIDICULOUS compliment.

J2 were phenomenal and I can't get the image of Sam falling into that hole and the look on his face out of my head even now. Woe. Thanks for your meta.

Hello again.
Again, I've been weak and I haven't been able to resist the tentation and I have read reviews for this episode.
First, thank you for your review. It's as beautiful as ever. I thank you to for being able to see the good things in every episode. I'm tired of supposed fans who spent their time trashing the show they supposedly love. But there are other people, and you are one of them, that even when they don't like everything (which is normal, we can't like everything everytime) they still speak about the good things. Really, thank you.
About the episode, I think I'm going to like it but, like you, I feel that Dean have been left in the cold. Once more. My toughs in the killing of the false prophet and angel Zach are that Dean is a servant of God, even if he doesn't know it. In his usual way, he does his work because he thinks it is his duty and he doesn't need a title to do it, he doesn't need to be said that he is special, some chosen. He just is.
My impression, however, is that someone in the network (I don't think it was Mr. Kripke at all, he didn't even write the episode, it was only the plot that has his name) decided that Sam should be the only hero in the end. For years I have had the impression that for some people in the network and the writing staff (Ms. Gamble, I'm looking at you) there was only a hero in that story, and that was Sam. So all the hints and promises that Dean was going to have a part in the end has been erased to made the show the travel of only one hero, that is, Sam.
And you know what? I don't mind. They have failed. I think they have made Dean even a bigger hero that he was. Dean, my Dean, is only a man. But what a man. A man who puts his life in helping others, a man who only find value in himself doing thing for others, a man who sacrifices love, life and soul for others. At the end we see him trying to keep his promise to his beloved brother even when it isn't what he wants. I don't think he needs to "mature". I don't think he can. It's his nature. And for that he is the frigging hero in the end, because even when he knows that he isn't important for the big showdown between the big forces, he goes there to do the human thing, to be with the person he loves till the end. And that he does. And I love him.
(Yeah, I know he is not real. Sniff)
Ejem. Hera end the rant. Please, excuse me for the language mistakes and the silly rambling and have a very nice summer.
Almu

Oh my gosh!!! What I LOVED about the episode was how it handled Sam and Dean's relationship!


Indeed, the episode handled the beauty of the relationship between the brothers very well. I didn't see it as clearly though until I read your blog. =) Thanks for sharing that and helping me see how great that was!

Still, hearing Dean telling Sam he was there for him was just BEAUTIFUL:

"Sam, it's okay. It's okay. I'm here. I'm here. I'm never going to leave you. I'm never going to leave you."

Then when Sam regains control, he gives almost the same reassurance back to Dean:

"It's okay, Dean. It's gonna be okay. I've got him."


I didn't catch this when I watched the episode, how Sam was saying back to Dean exactly what Dean had been saying to him. Guess that's what happens when I'm up late watching the episode with the volume really low, lol. :) Its such a beautiful moment indeed!

And you already know my thoughts on how I feel about them not concluding the storyline they built up for Dean this season. There were hints of more to Dean and while I am glad Dean stayed human, it would have been nice to have those moments (that they put emphasis on to begin with) flushed out and explained. =/

Dean going to Lisa, while ultimately not the best place for Dean, I think is where he needs to be right now. Lisa knows about his life as a hunter and accepts it and him. By no means will life with Lisa and Ben satisfy Dean while he believes Sam is in Hell. BUT--I think Lisa will provide a much needed shelter and reprieve for Dean, allowing him to heal some from the events of the past several years. And then I believe in my heart Dean will start searching for a way to help Sam. However, I think Dean has learned all to well the consequences of the dead being brought back. So that is a dilemma I think he'll be wrestling with.

This was a fantastic blog and a good season finale. Until the new season, I'm gonna check out your old character studies! :D

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