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Point of No Return: "Because, you're still my big brother."
sophie_deangirl
Life has no other discipline to impose, if we would but realize it, than to accept life unquestioningly. Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate, or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind. Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such. -Henry Miller

Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose. -Helen Keller

Faith is the strength by which a shattered world shall emerge into the light. -Helen Keller



Whoa! This episode just decimated me! Yet it also made me the happiest DeanGirl on the face of this planet!! That about sums up the back and forth of emotions I was experiencing as I watched it unfold. Dean was as deeply despaired as Sam was flawlessly faithful. The comparisons between them stark. I LOVED every beautiful moment of it.

Some might say it didn't seem to have all of the sparkle and bright lights worthy of a 100th episode, but I couldn't disagree more. If anything, it was perfectly pitched for the kind of episode only Supernatural can pull off. Everything was there, nothing cheaply produced, no wasted effort expended in creating the turmoil that everyone was feeling only to have it let us down with a cheesy and contrived happy ending. No way. Every step to healing was brutal agony and open wounds. Nothing was spared in getting there and it worked.

When we first see Dean, he's packing up his possessions, as if stripping himself of all of his wordly possesions, with the intent of sending them to Bobby (love that Dean addresses it Robert Singer --we've never thought of Bobby so formal before -- also a nice nod to the real life namesake). The prized symbols of Dean, the leather jacket formerly belonging to John, the keys to the Impala, his gun and a letter. Sam clearly has the amulet (I refuse to believe that he didn't pull it out of the trash -- maybe waiting for the right moment to give it back to his brother. I hope that moment is coming). Before we learned that Dean was sending everything to Bobby, I had assumed that they were going to Sam as maybe a last good bye, but given Dean's loss of faith in him, I'm not surprised that they are going to Bobby. We don't see who the letter is addressed to and WAY better eyes than mine might have magnified enough of the words on the paper to figure it out, but that, too, wasn't a given, that he had written to Sam. Still, the actions are as good as a last will and testament as only a Winchester can leave. Even when Sam appears (and yay that he does--all that hunter's tracking skill didn't get wasted after all. Dean's shock at being found, PRICELESS and said it all), he asks if it's all a glorifed candygram, a suicide legacy.

Sam was the EVER PRESENT and UNFAILING faith and glue for EVERYONE in the episode and I JUST LOVED that he was. Jared was BEYOND STELLAR here! He pulled off everything with such belief in the cause and for everyone around him, struggling to single-handedly keep everyone on the same page with him. I cheered! He played Sam with such strength and conviction. It was just thudworthy! Every SamGirl was probably proud as punch at seeing him! As well they should because it was Sam's rock solid belief in Dean that totally made the episode uplifting amongst all the despair. Without that belief, it would have been angst for angst-sake, not that there's anything wrong with that, angst lover right here *points to self, but to not have any return on all that agonizing investment would have been just too much to bear for this DeanGirl who was going down the drain with Dean and would have felt cheated if there wasn't something to keep me hoping so I LOVED that Sam was that embodiment of hope. I was also glad that it got resolved in the one episode. Some might argue it was too easily resolved especially after the long build up to Dean's hitting rock bottom (which I thought he had reached several times -- talk about making sure that he was as low as he could be beaten down short of going to Hell again), but I didn't think that. I think that deep down, Dean was hoping, himself, for something to grab onto, no longer expecting it or looking for it (feeling it was just too much to hope for after all the beating down he'd been getting) so when Sam gave him his trust to not let him down, it was all Dean needed to rise up to the occasion. That act showed Dean that Sam wasn't the Sam he felt had betrayed him anymore. For Winchesters, it's all in the actions you take and Sam proved to Dean that he believed his big brother would do the right thing when push came to shove.

I love how Sam owns up to his own share of running when he faces Dean:

"All you've ever done is run away."

"And I was wrong, every single time I did."


Sam does a wonderful job of pushing his lessons learned onto Dean by pointing out how running away had been disastrous for him so he knows what he's talking about and can authoritatively tell Dean how wrong he is to do it himself.

This was also a PIVOTAL admission because on some points, Dean had a right to be angry, had a right to want to run, had a right to lose faith in his little brother upon learning how much of Sam's Heaven revolved around having run away from his family, from Dean specifically. For Sam to finally say that running away was wrong, that he was wrong for doing it, gives Dean credit for that accusation. It's emphasied again with a touch of humor when Adam shows up:

"We've got our hands full, Dean; a house full of flight risks."

I think the hardest points for me were when Dean disregarded the company of his fellow comrades. ESPECIALLY Bobby. It was the first time this DeanGirl glared at Dean as Sam did, supremely disappointed at his cruelty to a man who HAS been like a father to him, Dean so much as saying so in Dream a Little Dream, and who prevents himself from selfishly taking his own life because of a promise he made to Dean that he wouldn't give up. Bobby had the greatest right to lash out because Dean was being plain unfair. My friend Tiffany gave Dean a more noble excuse for his anger, that he might have been creating a distance between his loved ones on purpose so that when he does say yes, obstensibly letting them down, they could walk away saying that he was a loser anyway, preferring to leave them with that impression rather than have them sacrifice themselves to what he now sees is a no-win situation, adding to an already burgeoning casualty list that he rattles off to Sam. I was hoping against hope that maybe Tiffany was right, that Dean didn't mean what he was saying, but sadly I had to accept that he did mean every cruel word because he was feeling so burdened and lashing out. I wanted SO much to slap Dean at that point, to knock some sense in that noggin of his. Reasonable or not, it was not called for to hurt Bobby that way, yet the DeanGirl in me also wanted to hug him all that much more. Dean had to have been in serious, awful pain to have done what he did to people he considered as friends and family. Something so against his very nature. What capped it for me was catching Jensen's expression when Bobby yelled at him. He looked so much in pain, as if he hated hurting Bobby. Jensen is just FREAKIN' AMAZING at being subtle like that, allowing Dean to show that he isn't proud of how he's hurting Bobby, but feeling he has no choice. Once again, "how does Jensen do that?"

Still, Tiffany's point makes Dean's struggle less vindictive and so much more poignant. It is so UNBELIEVABLY sad that NONE of them sees how much pain Dean is feeling about making his albeit ill-advised decision because he doesn't see any other choice, that without firepower of some sort, they don't have a chance, that everyone will die on his watch. That's the truth and a very real burden that only Dean can bear. Is his anger partly from pain? Sure. Is there a touch of selfish resentment for his brother? Of course. Does Dean feel abandoned and that he's alone in his choice? You bet and again, it's all true. Until Adam is falsely presumed as a potential heir apparent, Dean and only Dean can make that awful choice and bear the consequences of whatever he decides, as Dean says, that's all on him. In some ways, it's easier for Sam. He can flatly refuse and walk away, robbing Lucifer of his "weapon" to do more destruction, but Dean is damned if he does, damned if he doesn't. Despite Bobby's assertion that becoming Michael's vessel won't save every life, he's forgetting that Dean refusing could mean casualties too, probably more because the Apocalypse and Lucifer would continue unchecked. Don't get me wrong,it doesn't absolve Dean's behavior, but it does make you see how torn he is. So instead of treating him like "what's wrong with you?" or "get over it already" in a derogatory way, they should see he's in terrible pain about making his choice, a choice he doesn't WANT to make, but feels he HAS to make (BIG difference between the two) to save as many people as he can because he thinks not making it will cost more lives. No one is there, not even God, to help Dean Winchester, human being with no special powers like Sam does (with the addition of demon blood cocktails which helps amp things up) fight. They should be providing comfort and support for his original decision not just tell him to not give up. It's hollow because in Dean's eyes, rightfully so, all the messages he's been getting is that HE, Dean Winchester has nothing else to offer, but his body as a weapon, a sword, and it rankles him to be just a tool, as it should, but in his current frame of mind, he feels it's all anyone wants from him so why not give in? This makes his later condition to Zach that much more meaningful. He wasn't going to give up his body without a fight or without taking Zach down as a last stand act. That's the Dean we know and love, but it took Sam's leap of faith in him to finally break through.

I LOVED Sam at every juncture in this. He was everyone's rock. He was the only one who could be that rock with everything going on and unraveling before his eyes. Still, Dean does test Sam's resolve by saying the one thing that could have easily broken Sam. That he had lost faith in Sam's ability to resist Lucifer. Just like he did with Bobby only even crueler, Dean tore at the very fabric of their relationship, their brotherhood, a condition Sam took for granted for years and that, if truth be told, Dean used as a crutch for his own existence, a crutch that was shattered in Dark Side of the Moon. To hear Dean throw his distrust right into Sam's face was heartbreaking. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It was like nails on a blackboard, an alien sound that cuts to the nervous system and makes you cringe:

"I just don't believe."

"In what?"

"In you. I mean I don't...I don't know whether it's going to be demon blood or some other demon chick or what but I do know they're going to find a way to turn you."

"So you're saying I'm not strong enough?"

"You're angry. You're self righteous. Lucifer's gonna wear to you to the prom man it's just a matter of time."


Dean's observations aren't all untrue and the truth always hurts no matter how much insight you're trying to provide, but it's not the truth that wounds, it's the loss of belief that does. Sam is hurt, but he returns even stronger, battling back at Dean, not with harsh words, but with the very action and words he knows Dean really needs to hear from him and only him. No one else can restore Dean's belief in Sam and himself than Sam:

"I don't get it, Sam. Why are you doing this?"

"Because, you're still my big brother."


BINGO! The totally right thing to say and to nail home his trust Sam says:

"When push shoves you'll make the right call."

This is knowledge Sam knows full well about his big brother and he banks on it and thankfully, though with a moment of uncertainty, Dean performs as hoped and predicted when they face Zach.

Sidenote: Okay, is it me or did others wonder who the HECK is Zach's boss? I mean God has so much as "left the building" and I refuse to believe that He would even give Zach the time of day let alone a second chance at getting Dean to say yes to Michael so it does give one pause about who was calling the shots to Zach. Michael? Whoever the puppetmaster was, Dean's taken Zach out of the equation so who's next in line to get in Dean's way? Or was Zach a test of Dean's resolve? That Dean had to stop Zach to take the next step. To what is anyone's guess.

I LOVED Kurt Fuller. He played a perfectly menacing angel and transformed the stereotype by turning it on it's head and then some. Though I'll miss Kurt, I was SO glad that Dean finally ganked Zach, that Dean's comeback came from a look and wink to Sam and an angel killing sword. Symbolically, it made sense that for Dean to make his turnaround, it had to come from not letting Sam down, an act that used to come instinctively for him, but that lately has been about just going through the motions or at best, doing it half-heartedly. It also makes sense that it would start with the death of Zach.

Okay, Adam. I am among the many who wasn't crazy about having a half-Winchester brother in the first place, but I now see why he was written into the mythology because he serves as a trick to get Dean to do what he can't seem to help himself from doing. Sacrifice himself, not allowing anyone to take a bullet meant for him. A point Sam makes with frustration:

"Do you think you can maybe take a half second and stop trying to sacrifice yourself for a change?"

We are led to believe that a "substitution" can be made by Cas, that a half-Winchester brother is better than none, but I knew it was all just a rouse and I knew that Dean's first reaction would be to prevent Adam from getting wrapped up into what he considers is his fight. For me, Adam's appearance was a throwaway and maybe the only weak spot of the episode for me. It was amusing to see Adam as having some of Dean's attitude, probably trying to make him fit in as a Winchester, father issues and all, but all in all he was just a sacrificial lamb to use against the real prize, Dean, to take advantage of Dean's propensity for self-sacrifice.

Second to Sam's need to turn Dean around and convince him that he hasn't given up on him, that he believes in him, is Cas's complete and utter disillusionment of Dean's pending decision. Cas has, in his own way, been thrust into the supreme crisis of faith of his life. His downward spiral was brought on by Joshua's message that God is not going to help them, that his belief feels wasted, so much so he goes on a bender and in this episode hits his own rock bottom when he thinks, Dean, too, is going to waste everything he has sacrificed. Cas is angry, is also going through the motions, sniping at Dean every chance he gets until he's brought to a breaking point and he pummels Dean in the alley, venting all of his frustration on him, accusing Dean of convincing him to abandon everything he knew and believed in to help him only for Dean to give up. I loved that in this scene, Dean lets Cas beat him. You can see on Dean's face how sorry he feels for making Cas give up everything for a belief and conviction that he no longer believes in. In a way, I can't blame Cas because Dean uses a sigil to blow Cas away so he could escape. Another low blow on Dean's part that hurts to watch. Cas is as devastated as Dean and though he comes with Sam and Dean to Van Nys, of all places, to rescue Adam who's in the beautiful room, he voices his feelings bluntly and directly aimed at Dean just before he decides to take on what seems like a suicide mission with an exacto knife...yikes:

"Maybe it is, but then I won't have to watch you fail. Sorry, Dean I don't have the same faith in you that Sam does."

Ouch! Dean's reaction said it all. That hurt Dean and you can't help, but wonder if maybe Cas was being reckless because he's just as lost as Dean and no longer cares what happens to him. He uses the knife to carve a sigil into his flesh (ouch squared) and throws his angel adversaries as well as himself to a place unknown.

This episode was a tour de force for Misha Collins and he was AWESOME, demonstrating Cas's complete fall from grace and faith effectively. You can also feel how betrayed he feels in every look he gives to Dean. He also gets to kick some serious ass, talk about venting! Misha makes the most of both the seriously painful moments as well as the kick ass ones. Glad he got to stretch a little and become more than just an angel meandering in his human vessel. In the last two episodes, Cas's faith has been crushed twice, first by God's indifference and then by someone he pulled from Perdition based on orders by God and had allowed to convince him to rebel against all he had known and believed. He had high hopes at the start of his mission but now all that's been left to him is ambivalence and he's been left bereft, confused and angry, human emotions that he doesn't understand how to manage.

In the final smackdown, when Zach has Adam and Sam in pain and spitting up blood, you see Dean's face filled with helplessness, he's not the Dean who stared down Zach and remained firm and unswayed in Sympathy for the Devil, telling Zach no to becoming Michael's vessel, least that's what you are led to think, but just as even Sam is about to lose all hope that he's made any difference at all, Dean looks into his eyes, his expression soft yet determined, then he smiles and winks. And this DeanGirl was never so happy to see that Dean spark back. He's got a plan. He then presents his condition, that before he becomes Michael's vessel, Michael has to gank Zach. Zach laughs and threatens, but it's then that you realize that Dean has the angel killing knife and he plunges it into Zach.

In the flash of Zach's dying light you see a glow in Dean's eyes. Though it would be easy to say that they were just reflections, my friends Tiffany and Tamara posited that maybe there was more to it. Why focus on that if it was just to accentuate Zach's dying light in Dean's eyes? I LOVE their idea. After all, we have yet to figure out why Dean is a servant of Heaven. I don't think it's the kind of thing you can be one minute and then not be the next arbitrarily. I think once bestowed, you remain a servant of Heaven so if that's the case, then Dean couldn't have become it from just thinking about saying yes to being Michael's vessel. I believe with my whole heart that it was bestowed on Dean and they are only just discovering it. Perhaps that plane trip did more than cleanse him from his sins and seemingly his memories too. If that trip was orchestrated by God, then I can believe Dean was made a servant of Heaven then. It's fun speculation, but ultimately, it's wonderful enough just to know that Dean is special and now that he's back from the depths of despair, the brothers can move forward again, united as they should be.

This brings us to the ending which Supernatural does so well. Our brothers in the beloved Impala as they always should be and Dean confessing his moment of epiphany:

"Honestly? The damnedest thing. I mean the world's ending; the walls are coming down on us; I look over at you and all I can think about is lplthis stupid son of a bitch brought me here. I just didn't want to let you down."

"You didn't. You almost did, but you didn't."

"I owe you an apology...just let me say this. I don't know if it's being a big brother or what, but to me you've always been this snot-nosed kid that I've had to keep on the straight and narrow...I think we both know that's not you anymore. I mean, hell, if you've grown up enough to find faith in me, least I can do is return the favor. So screw destiny right in the face. I say we take the fight to them and do it our way."

"Sounds good."


As always it was breathtaking in the best of ways, seeing Sam with a self-satisfied smile at having his brother back, of having proven to Dean and to himself that all they have is each other and watching Dean emerge from his darkness confident again, having the one person he needed most at his back again. I don't know about you, but I felt such a relief come over me feeling I could finally breathe again.

Some might argue it wasn't the kind of 100th episode they were expecting for better or for worse, but for me, I thought it was MIRACULOUS! My only hope and goal was achieved, the reuniting of our brothers after such a long and agonizing estrangement. I can now see them facing the battle ahead fully armed with the weapons for which they are most proficient, the strength they give to each other by having faith in each other. With that, they can defeat anything. The only uncertainty is the fate of Cas. The only thing we know for sure is that he will be back, just not when or in what frame of mind.

I LOVED this episode. It was just the triumph I needed to lift me from my own despair. It was a satisfying and fulfilling 100th and well-deserved for a show that continues to keep me engaged and committed to the fates of our Winchester brothers.

Thanks for reading as always. Next up Hammer of the Gods.





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Some might say it didn't seem to have all of the sparkle and bright lights worthy of a 100th episode, but I couldn't disagree more. If anything, it was perfectly pitched for the kind of episode only Supernatural can pull off.

I agree! I have to admit, in some ways, I was hoping for a little more action, but I loved the rich emotions it contained, and I think, for the 100th episode, that was a perfect choice. Sam and Dean's relationship was at the center of it all. :)

He pulled off everything with such belief in the cause and for everyone around him, struggling to single-handedly keep everyone on the same page with him.

I really liked that too! It was nice to see Sam act with quiet wisdom, instead of arrogance and pride, which we've seen in the past.

I think that deep down, Dean was hoping, himself, for something to grab onto, no longer expecting it or looking for it (feeling it was just too much to hope for after all the beating down he'd been getting) so when Sam gave him his trust to not let him down, it was all Dean needed to rise up to the occasion.

I completely agree! :) I think that was what had hurt Dean the most. Sam had betrayed him, yes, but more than anything, he was showing that he didn't trust Dean anymore. Dean needed to know that his little brother believes in him.

I was hoping against hope that maybe Tiffany was right, that Dean didn't mean what he was saying, but sadly I had to accept that he did mean every cruel word because he was feeling so burdened and lashing out.

Thank you as always for the mentions! :) I think Dean meant it too, but I think, under normal circumstances, he might have held back those words, where at that point, he felt it was better to use the truth to push them away. I think as you've said too, that he was probably in so much pain, he didn't have the energy to sugar-coat anything. Everything he said came out bluntly. *winces*

In some ways, it's easier for Sam. He can flatly refuse and walk away, robbing Lucifer of his "weapon" to do more destruction.

So true!

For me, Adam's appearance was a throwaway and maybe the only weak spot of the episode for me.

I agree. :) Adam kind of comes across as a plot device. I can see why they need him, but still, a plot device, lol. I'm curious what role he'll play as things continue though...

Ouch! Dean's reaction said it all. That hurt Dean and you can't help, but wonder if maybe Cas was being reckless because he's just as lost as Dean and no longer cares what happens to him. He uses the knife to carve a sigil into his flesh (ouch squared) and throws his angel adversaries as well as himself to a place unknown.

Very well said! I think Cas is being careless. And again, I completely agree! What Cas said definitely hurt Dean.

In the flash of Zach's dying light you see a glow in Dean's eyes. Though it would be easy to say that they were just reflections, my friends Tiffany and Tamara posited that maybe there was more to it.

*grins* Tamara and I were talking more about that, lol, and Tamara made an awesome point that, if he is just a regular human, Dean's eyes should have simply burned out because of the "angel grace". And, it made me think too of that scene in "Yellow Fever" when Sam's eyes flashed yellow. That was a very big clue by the writers. Sam and Dean's paths have run parallel so far. If Sam, as Lucifer's vessel, has powers of his own, it makes sense that Dean does too. And they call him "The Sword"...a sword is a weapon. That seems to imply that he's more than just a meat suit for Michael. Tamara also point out something else really cool. Last season, Uriel said that only an angel can kill another angel. What if it takes more than just having an angel's sword? If it does, what does that say about Dean? :D

Awesome, awesome blog as always! :D

-Laughter

I enjoyed the episode and thought it was a fitting one for the 100th! They kept to their story and myth while addressing character issues that are current yet date back in a way to the beginning. This samgirl was very pleased by the acension of Sammy to that mind set called hope. Hope is what humans have, despair belongs to angels. At least that's how it appears on this show.

I'm sure you are familar with this quote: "Treat People as if they were what they ought to be, you will help them to become what they are capable of being." by Goethe. Sam's actions follow that line of thinking. Sam had to let go of Dean and trust that Dean would rise up in that moment. That's a big leap of faith for Sam, but it worked.

Maybe Dean will have a bit more faith in himself. I don't think that Dean is done healing, it's a long journey and I still feel he has to let go of himslef more, become free of everything, but he's getting there. I think the final car conversation (which I'm pretty sure happened in a stolen truck, since the Impala was likely still at Bobby's) did not prove that Dean fully trusts Sam to resist Lucifer, but at least Dean is willing to trust him as a partner and an equal.

Everyone was outstanding, but Misha Collins brought out everything in his creation of Cas. I'd give him the best props, then equally the J's!

I really do hope that Dean is the servant of Heaven by the virtue of his own virtue, not anything else. It would go along way towards making him realize just what a special person he is.

Yay!! Supernatural 100 !!! \0/

I don't really remember the heartache in this episode, just the euphoria of the ending, having Sam and Dean back in sync again. I really wasn't expecting it. (This is Supernatural after all. We don't get happy endings often.)

My only concern is for Castiel. I want to know he's OK. I admit, Adam is not my favorite addition to the Winchester clan. I was relieved to discover he was actually dead in Jump the Shark. So, I'm finding it rather hard to care if he's alright, except in a general how-are-the-angels/writers-gonna-use-him-to-screw-with-the-Winchesters/us kinda way. But Castiel has come to own me the Sam, Dean and Bobby have.

By the way, have you considered sharing your posts on spn_heavymeta? bardicvoice posts hers there.

Edited at 2010-04-18 11:28 pm (UTC)

This really was an awesome episode! A perfect 100th episode for this fantastic show :D I admit I was a bundle of nerves about it and even thought about not watching, but I am soooo glad I did!

Sam was the EVER PRESENT and UNFAILING faith and glue for EVERYONE in the episode and I JUST LOVED that he was.

I agree! Jared did a wonderful job playing Sam with a quiet faith and certainty that worked to hold everyone somewhat together. But it was also, in this girl's humble opinion, about time Sam did this! Dean has been that glue for everyone for so long it was wonderful to see Sam return the favor.

Some might argue it was too easily resolved especially after the long build up to Dean's hitting rock bottom (which I thought he had reached several times -- talk about making sure that he was as low as he could be beaten down short of going to Hell again), but I didn't think that.

I certainly don't think it was too easily resolved! And when considered how far down Dean was beaten, how much he has suffered, its not hard to understand why he finally decided he would say yes to Michael. Sam had only spoken with words about how much he loved Dean up to this point and this time, he put actions to his words and that was enough for Dean.

On the issue of Dean's words to those he considers family (ie Sam, Bobby, and even Castiel)I think that by this episode, Dean pulling out the stops and was done sugarcoating everything. He's put up with so much! And he feels used on all sides. Here, Dean lashed out at Bobby harshly--cruelly even--because I think being told not to give up hope while at the same time not being supported (again) was just the last straw. It doesn't excuse him by any means, but considering Dean is all about humanity, this was testament to how human he is.

The only thing that really bugs me about this episode is not in fact the half-Winchester brother Adam being brought back (seemed like just a plot device to me too), but Castiel beating Dean up. Before that, of course, was Dean banishing Cas with the blood sigil. *winces* I would expect Castiel to be angry about that, but his anger seemed strangely out of proportion. Personally I think Cas took out his anger at God also on Dean. Worse, Dean didn't fight back, just let Castiel beat him. Cas lost all of his faith so quickly. I didn't see Cas trying to talk Dean out of saying yes to Michael or offer another option after he found out God said to back off. It was like the rogue angel gave up then and only stuck with the Winchesters because he had nowhere else to go, hence his fury when Dean went to say yes. So while I'm concerned about Castiel after he disappeared, I'm also a bit angry at him. He gave up way faster then Dean, even Sam. I wonder if t even crossed Cas's mind that Dean was saying yes because he was trying to do what he believed to be right, and protect not just Sam and Bobby, but Cas as well.

In the flash of Zach's dying light you see a glow in Dean's eyes. Though it would be easy to say that they were just reflections, my friends Tiffany and Tamara posited that maybe there was more to it.

Ah, thanks for the mention! *blushes* And yes, I do believe there is something important about seeing that glow in Dean's eyes. But what is is, I have no idea. Tiffany and I were talking and I asked how it was possible for Dean to be even able to look at Zach as he died considering he was looking at raw Angel grace and everyone else who has looked upon an angel's true form has ended up with their eyes burned out. This is further emphasized in the beginning of the episode when Zachariah was in the bar and the man he was drinking with lost his eyes to Michael's(?) Grace. I also wonder about Dean being able to kill Zachariah at all. Last season Uriel said the only thing that could kill an angel, is another angel. So having an angel sword shouldn't mean the Winchesters could kill Zach...all of this leads back to me wondering how Dean was able to kill Zachariah in the first place. So, if Dean has an angel sword he should be able to kill Lucifer, right? Ha! No way is it that simple! Something's going on with Dean Winchester that nobody seems to recognize yet.

Loved reading this! Thanks for sharing! :D

Thanks for your comment!

Thanks for commenting on my blog. I LOVE your observations and especially your reminder of some pivotal points that I had forgotten about:

"...and everyone else who has looked upon an angel's true form has ended up with their eyes burned out."

I had TOTALLY forgotten about poor Pam and Cas's explanation about his true visage. EXCELLENT memory and point!!

Also fantastic was your point about how Dean could kill Zach. Uriel did say that angels could only kill angels so that gives Dean something special that could give him the advantage he needs and doesn't realize he's had it all along. Kind of like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz always having the ability to go home. I LOVE the possibilities!

Thanks for sharing!




I totally forgot to add to my last comment. Dean was totally writing that letter to Sam. And most importantly, he can't really send the box to Sam as Sam has no residence so Bobby is the most logical person he would send it to. I mean, no one will get the meaningfulness of his possession than Sam. And regardless of Dean is having a fallout with Sam, he still loves Sam. I'm surprised that people couldn't peg that so easily. The writers nor directors didn't have the camera zoom in on Sam's name anywhere because they trusted us to know the characters enough by now to guess it very easily. And Jensen played it so well. Just a little something i thought i'd point out.

The writers nor directors didn't have the camera zoom in on Sam's name anywhere because they trusted us to know the characters enough by now to guess it very easily.

Heee. I absolutely agree that Dean was writing to Sam, but I thought the writers/directors were hedging and carefully not showing it to us because they are mean SOBs who like leaving us in suspense. *g*

EXCELLENT POINT! Talk about a "duh" moment when I read your point about who else could Dean send his stuff to but Bobby! Permanent residence! *hits herself upside the head. I also loved your point about Dean writing the letter to Sam. I, too, hoped that in some way, Dean made some kind of peace in that note, maybe telling Sam he didn't mean what he said to him. Man, I hope someone magnified that letter! Hee!!!

Someone did. And although we can't see who Dean addressed the letter to, it appears to be both Bobby and Sam, and perhaps also Castiel.

I completely adored this episode and I enjoyed reading your thoughts here.

...we have yet to figure out why Dean is a servant of Heaven.

I keep seeing people puzzled by this, and yet, didn't Dean swear exactly that? To serve Heaven? I'm sure that happened early in the season. Then the angels turned out to be dicks, and God had left the building, but still.

My friend and I were also discussing the significance of Dean's eyes reflecting the angel light. Is it just that a dying grace is insufficient, or showing us that a vessel can look upon an angel without burning out (and we saw Adam being lit up by Michael's presence, but not his eyes catching fire - although of course that might have happened the second after the scene cut us away from him), or is it a special privilege or step forward for Dean?

Hello.
It's been a long time since I commented in your blog. Sorry, but I'm trying to mot be spoiled TOO much, and the last episode I have seen was 5.1.
But this is episode 100, and I had to read your comment.
As ever, I love it. (Just for the record, I think, seeing what you write and how you write it, that you must be a very good person).
I like that Sam has grew up. It was about time. I have to confess that I don't like him very much, I have found him bratty and childish many times. But now he has acted like a good and strong man, like someone you can count on. Here is a man I can like.
But I disagree with you in some points. I think Dean has a right to lash out for a change. He is crushed by the weight in his shoulders, and his family and friends only tell him not to say yes, but they don't give him another option he han take. Bobby, Castiel and Sam, all of them, had yelled at him, insulted him and blamed him for things he wasn't to blame. And he always took it, without a word, and they never apologized to him. It seems they didn't think he has a reason to be hurt, like he cant be human and weak. Has Castiel forgot his little stunt when he left Sam out? Has Booby forgot his changing opinions in 4,21 and 4.22 and his (in my opinion hurtful and unfair) rant to Dean in 4.22? Sorry, but Castiel beating a depressed and burdened man way weaker than him doesn't make me love him.
Thank you for your review. I hope I can get this season episodes soon to watch our dear show and to read your lovely comments.
As always, please forgive me my language mistakes.
Almu

Thanks for your comments!!

Great to hear from you Almu! No apologies necessary. I understand about spoilers. I am a lover of spoilers so I get them anywhere I can! Hee! Thank you SO MUCH for your compliment about my writing. I really am appreciative that you think I am a good person from my writing. I don't blame you for your defense of Dean. I totally understand it and for the most part, I agree, and especially love your point about Dean's humanity and how much weight he carries and has carried without appreciation. I also like your point about Cas taking out his own despair onto Dean, it does diminish him. I didn't think Cas was any more correct than Dean in his abuse of Bobby. Yes, Bobby has yelled at Dean, but I think from tough love and in at least one case, it allowed Dean to get past his hurt to see that Sam needed him even if later Sam would disappoint him yet again. I just didn't think Dean was right in saying Bobby wasn't his father. He's been as good a father as anyone, perhaps even more so than John and deserved better respect than Dean gave him. Just for the same reason, Cas shouldn't have taken out his despair out on Dean, Dean should not have done the same to Bobby. I LOVE Dean, but he isn't perfect and because he has frailty and flaws, it makes him that much more noble and forgivable. I will always be a DeanGirl in the end, but in order to truly respect a character, you have to see their dark sides and accept them as well.

Thanks again!

Re: Thanks for your comments!!

Hello again. Thank you for your kind answer.
I agree with you in that I need a character to be human enough to like him/her. Without flaws a character isn't interesting. The true hero, in my opinion, has to be human and frail, because if they were perfect what would be their merits? I’m almost 40, I’m old enough to know that none is perfect, and that, like they say, a righteous person sins seven times before breakfast. In my fictional heroes I want real people I can admire for their personal achievements. If they are perfect thy are statues, not heroes. And Dean has flaws, i.e. he is stubborn, and too dependant in others. He makes mistakes like selling his soul. He was way too rude to the poor father in the zombie girl episode. But normally he owns his mistakes and is ready to pay for them, too. In fact, part of my love for Dean comes from seeing him being man enough to admit when he is at fault, learning from his mistakes and getting to be a better person for it.
I don't say that Dean is right to abuse anyone. Of course he isn't. I don't defend Dean's angry actions as good (I found his speech to the zombie girl’s father cruel, and if the poor father had clocked him one I would have given the poor man a cookie. Then Dean didn’t have a reason to vent but his own frustration. In this episode, like your friend, I think that in this episode he used attitude to be left alone and go on with his plan). But I have a problem with Bobby. Sorry, I think he got it coming.
I loved Bobby in the first three seasons. He was no-nonsense and though, sometimes the voice of reason. (But even then I had some problems with him. What did he think they should have done with DemonMeg if not exorcise the demon? Leave her tied up in his living room forever?) I LOVED his half angry half pitying words to Dean in 2.22, his gruff attitude, his house. But since the middle of season four I find that they write him badly, without coherence. I still like him sometimes, but other times I find him as obnoxious as John. For me, his opinion changes when they were detoxing Sam were annoying, he contradicted himshelf from one minute to the next. I found what he said to Dean in 4.22 uncalled for, insulting and unfair. He called a man who has been in hell whinny princess. He told the man who has devoted all his frigging life to others that he doesn't have a right to hope for a better treatment that he just have received (that is, being strangled by his beloved brother). For me, that isn’t though love. That’s venting on someone who is going to take it so you can low your own blood preasure. I’m not as good person as you, to me if Bobby is man enough to give it he should be man enough to take it.
My problem with all of this isn’t that Dean should be allowed to be a jerk. My problem is that he is the only one who isn’t allowed to, and the only one who ever pays for it or apologizes. So, if I have to understand Sam, Bobby and Castiel bitching, I can understand Dean when he goes off the chart. Give him a free pass? No. Understand him? Yes. I tend to be understanding with men in war, who has the weight of the world in his shoulders and difficult decisions to take.
Of course, that’s my humble opinion. I think I can have sympathy for Dean because he is in some ways like that of some book and movie characters I like. I like Robert E. Howard instinctive, strong, primitive warriors. I have great love for old westerns. In my view, Dean is like some of those western characters, those men James Stewart or John Wayne portrayed so well. They aren’t always kind, some of them have bad tempers, most of then have past mistakes to atone for, all of them are dangerous. But they are solid men, brave. They are the ones I’d like beside me when the going gets tough. They are there to make the decisions and do the things none else can or want. So I’m ready to cut them some slack here and there, because they have the hardest work.
Uff, what a long and silly post. Sorry for boring you. I hope you don’t have to put me in your “oh, is this annoying woman ranting again”. Ejem.
Have a very good day.
Almu

Re: Thanks for your comments!!

Wonderful points! You make very good and compelling arguments for Dean and I LOVED them. I especially LOVE your point about Dean not being allowed to be a jerk sometimes, to always have the expectations own up to his mistakes, which he does most of the time, when others are allowed a pass for their treatment of him. In a way, for me, Dean's ability to forgive even at his own expense is one of the qualities I love about him. I'm not saying it's good for him psychologically, but his ability to do it shows the kind of man he is. Many people say it just makes him a like a rug for people to walk all over, but other than Sam, Dean will set the limits. Awesome point that I hadn't considered and it's so true. Where Sam is concerned, Dean has forgiven beyond what any of us would probably have and because of that willingness to forgive he has been hurt the greatest by Sam. I LOVE John Wayne movies and westerns. I LOVE True Grit, The Shooter (his last movie), Rio Lobo, The Man who shot Liberty Valance, The Cowboys, Rio Bravo, I have all of those DVDs. I agree that I see Dean as a western hero. Dean is brave like he told Lucas in Dead in the Water and it's as simple as that.

As for Bobby, I happen to know that in a future episode, he will redeem himself in your eyes so be patient. Hee! For me, Bobby loves those boys and would do anything for them, that's what a father truly does as John did for them. Bobby doesn't have any parenting experience, so he does what he can to be there for those boys anyway that he can and he does that well and without hesitation. If he didn't feel that, how would he have the strength to prevent the demon within him from killing Dean? That's a lot of will and love there. As for the name calling, there's the defining line between them, yes, he's a father figure, but he's also their friend, their best friend second to each other and sometimes friends tease, cajole, and even call each other names, but it doesn't diminish the relationship, it just becomes part of its make up and nature.

Wonderful, though provoking discussion! I thoroughly enjoy it! Thanks!

I was so happy with this episode. I'm not a Dean girl but I am a brothers girl, and he was destroying me lately with the woe is me attitude, it's so good to see him out of the defeatist slump. I don't mean to disagree too much with what is a remarkably well discussed meta, the only area i do differ with you is that Sam has it easier and can walk away. I'd take Michael a vessel of heaven ten thousand times over Lucifer the biggest scourge to walk the earth. Sam has it much worse in that sense. At least Dean's vessel is supposed to be stopping Lucifer, Sam's just the devil incarnate.

I thought Sam was incredible this episode, just incredible, he had me in tears with his face and I was so happy to see them on the same page again. Sam's proved himself time and time again this season and he's earned the trust back now in my opinion.

Sam is hurt, but he returns even stronger, battling back at Dean, not with harsh words, but with the very action and words he knows Dean really needs to hear from him and only him. No one else can restore Dean's belief in Sam and himself than Sam

And by not being John, I might add. Their discussion of the last time they were in this situation with the roles reversed, Dean followed in his father's footsteps. Here, despite being very much like John himself, Sam took his own approach instead.

I think this contrasts quite strongly with Castiel. In the fight in the alley, we hear Dean say "Cas, please" not unlike what he did with possessed John in Devil's Trap. In both cases he was spared, but as we see later, Cas hasn't changed his approach -- he's still taking the blunt instrument tactic with Dean. But it's only Sam's approach that can win out because it does what John's never did, put the power for events in Dean's hands.

I think their change was most significant in breaking what had been a family pattern, and truly making their own way.

Our brothers in the beloved Impala as they always should be and Dean confessing his moment of epiphany

Indeed they should, but actually they weren't :) Presumably, they'd stolen a truck.

Thanks for your comments!!

Thanks for your comments. I loved reading them and appreciated them. Whoops my bad on the Impala perhaps it was just my wishful thinking talking. Hee!

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